One time he had some meaning; one time he made a stand
but then that man decided to be the Poobah Grand.
And so he sold his principles and auctioned off his soul
because he saw the power that should be his only goal.
Said he’d never lead a party that didn’t believe in climate change
but to some of those Neanderthals that was something strange
and so he put his hands up as he did with all he knew;
the worthlessness of Malcolm just grew and grew and grew.
He’s perfect for the Liberals where profit’s all that’s real;
where life is simply cashflow and another shady deal.
So, in case you hadn’t realised it – for him I’ll never vote;
that slimy man named Malcolm – Captain of a sinking boat.